ACT and Success and Failure

ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY (ACT) – AN ONLINE RESOURCE of inspirational quotes, poems and other act goodies

Q:  How should I deal with success and failure?

A:  Treat those two imposters just the same.

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As human beings we love it when things go well and we love it less when things go badly.  Of course we do, we are human.  This is a perfectly natural human reaction.

Having said that, we do not always know if our judgements of what is good or bad are that sound.  The benefits of success may seem resoundingly clear, the benefits of failure less so.  Success is lovely but it brings with it its own problems, and we know that out of failure can come great lessons, great opportunities for growth.

One of my favourite poems is Rudyard Kipling’s “If”.  It is no accident that it is one of the nation’s favourite poems too.   It speaks to something in all of us. If you don’t know it I urge you to read it, if you do know it, read it again!

Kipling talks to us of success and failure and reminds us to:

“Treat those two imposters just the same”

Wise words.  I wrote “SUCCESS AND FAILURE” to remind me of that.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

  • How do you treat success and failure?
  • Are you able to treat them even-handedly?
  • What can you share that might be of help to others?

Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.

 THOUGHT FOR TODAY

POEM FOR TODAY

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 SUCCESS AND FAILURE

 

I love that line in poetry, reminding us that we

Should regard success and failure as imposters mutually,

For though one may come to visit, we’d do well to not ignore

That the other’s in the shadows and may soon knock at our door.

It’s a truism alarming, life’s a challenge for us all,

And so sometimes we will be walking tall and sometimes we will fall,

And the mark of our maturity’s not just found in success,

For our steeliness is tempered in the depths of our distress.

And so let’s not pull up the drawbridge, cower behind the barricade,

Let’s remember men of fortitude aren’t born that way, they’re made,

And out of trial and tribulation there’s a prize that can be won

If we listen to the poet, “You will be a man my son.”

And so let’s not rush quick to judgement as to what is good or bad,

Nor else be too attached to happiness, too frightened to be sad,

For in the flow of our emotions, if we dare to look around,

We’ll see in both success and failure there is treasure to be found.

© Corinne Shields, 2016

If you enjoyed, “SUCCESS AND FAILURE” please pass it on, and do leave your comments.  I would love to hear from you.

And just before you go …..

A final word from ACT …..

On this occasion I am going to leave the final word to Rudyard Kipling!

I have drawn heavily on his inspirational poem, “If” in this post and so I will leave by quoting it in its entirety.  Enjoy!

Image result for rudyard kipling if

ACTivation Point!

SO ……………………….

How about YOU?

What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life?

 Just for today I will ………………………

If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you?

I am a student of ACT.  I am on a journey.  I would love you to join me.

With all good wishes

Corinne

ACT and Mindfulness in Action

ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY (ACT) – AN ONLINE RESOURCE

Q:  How can I stop chasing my tail?

A:  Try a little Mindfulness!

Mindfulness is a real buzz word these days.  In an external world of increasing busyness it can be hard to find a place of peace.  In an internal world of spinning thoughts and constant conjecture it can be difficult to switch off.

The fact that Mindfulness is finding such popularity nowadays speaks for itself.  In such a hectic world more and more of us are looking for a way to slacken off the pace.  Mindfulness seems to offer an answer.  It is simple but it is not easy; it is relatively quick to learn and its benefits are relatively quickly felt; it is always at hand, as near as our next breath.

When we are going round in circles, both in the external and the internal world, Mindfulness can help us to find a way out.

I wrote “MINDFULNESS IN ACTION” to remind me of that.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

  • How do you use Mindfulness in your life?
  • When do you find it most useful?
  • What can you share that might be of help to others?

Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY

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POEM FOR TODAY

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MINDFULNESS IN ACTION

 

If Mind is busy wandering let’s bring it back to base,

Pay attention to our breathing and let’s slacken off the pace,

And let’s feel the life force fill us, energising everywhere,

This is Mindfulness in action, taking time to be aware.

Every moment it is possible, this being here and now,

When we notice Mind’s hijacking us, but now we won’t kowtow

To its constant little stories or its subtle siren calls,

We have skills we now can draw upon and so the hijack stalls.

And when we are in position, pure awareness kicking in,

Let’s explore what now is happening, outside us and within,

And let’s tune in to our senses, give them leave to roam around,

Let us sharpen our antennae, feel a touch, enjoy a sound.

There is so much we are missing when we’re hostage to our Mind,

When we disregard our senses which, too often left behind

May become a little deadened, dampened down through lack of use,

It maybe we’ll have to woo them back, take time to them seduce.

And so if we have been neglectful of our senses let us say

That we’ll take some time for Mindfulness, a little every day,

And then in time we’ll come to realise what can be hard to see,

That though a thinking Mind’s a marvel, it’s not all there is to me.

© Corinne Shields, 2016

If you enjoyed, “MINDFULNESS IN ACTION” please pass it on, and do leave your comments.  I would love to hear from you.

And just before you go …..

A final word from ACT …..

I really like the idea that Mindfulness is:

“simple but not easy.”

It makes you think that it is accessible, and it is.  It make you think that it is for all of us, not just the clever dicks, and it is.  It makes you think that if you put some effort into it then you can achieve results, and you can.

Christopher Bergland at Psychology Today has written a great article entitled “Mindfulness Made Simple”.  I really enjoyed it.  I’ll quote the opening paragraph to give you a flavour:

“Mindfulness has become a buzzword that is often misinterpreted.  What is mindfulness?  How can it benefit you?

Mindfulness is much more basic than most people realize.  In fact, I’ve isolated 3 easy steps to kick-start a state of mindfulness in a few seconds.  To kick-start a state of mindfulness all you have to do is:

STOP.  BREATHE.   THINK ABOUT YOUR THINKING.  Anybody can use this simple mindfulness technique throughout the day to stay calm, focused, optimistic and kind.”

ACTivation Point!

SO ……………………….

just-for-today-i-will-tune-in

How about YOU?

What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life?

 Just for today I will ………………………

If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you?

I am a student of ACT.  I am on a journey.  I would love you to join me.

With all good wishes

Corinne

ACT and Keeping a Cool Head

ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY (ACT) – AN ONLINE RESOURCE

Q:  What should I do when my mind goes into overdrive?

A:  Be sceptical.  Remember that your Mind is a great story teller.

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When our mind goes into overdrive and thoughts start churning round this is not the time to make decisions.   When we are overwrought and becoming embroiled in our stories this is not the time to take action.  When our mind starts projecting the worst and is urging us to do something, do anything, this is not the time to give in to its demands.

At such times, and there may be many, this is the time to remember that Mind is, amongst other things, a great Story Teller.  We can, and maybe should, learn to look at it with awe;  its skills are formidable.  But as for doing what it tells us, well maybe not!

The time to take action is when the story lines are fading, when cool heads are replacing angry hearts.

I wrote “COOL HEADS” to remind me of that.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

  • How do you create distance from your angry heart?
  • How do you resist the demands of the great story teller?
  • What can you share that might be of help to others?

Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY

 

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POEM FOR TODAY

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COOL HEADS

Mind starts to spin its fantasies, and we are soon in thrall

To the twists and turns it conjures up, as helplessly we fall

For the little bits of fiction that are urging us to act,

But let’s remember before acting, this is fantasy not fact.

Oh it’s hard to create distance when our stories start to spin,

When Mind’s going into overdrive ‘til everything within

Is embroiled within a story telling us what we should do,

But let the warning bells resound, this is a story, it’s not true.

There are times for taking action, preferably with a cool head,

When the story lines are fading, and we’re able to instead

Make decisions more considered based on actuality,

For an action has a consequence, it’s real not fantasy.

And so if Mind is busy spinning let’s remember it’s not real,

Amongst its many other functions Mind’s a giant spinning wheel

Which we can watch in all its glory as its stories tumble out,

But be aware a cool head’s squeezed out when a spinning wheel’s about.

And so let’s let Mind tell its stories, as it will do anyway,

But let’s remember that’s its function, and we’re not required today

To pay heed to its excesses, nor obey what it commands,

And though we may admire its skill, we need not do what it demands.

© Corinne Shields, 2016

If you enjoyed, “COOL HEADS” please pass it on, and do leave your comments.  I would love to hear from you.

And just before you go …..

A final word from ACT …..

It isn’t easy to defuse from unhelpful thoughts, to stand back from the riveting stories that our Mind conjures up.  And yet the more we can do this the less stressful our lives may become.

Learning that we needn’t believe everything that we think can be very liberating.  Not being held hostage by our story telling mind and not being bound to obey its sometimes outlandish demands can save us a heap of trouble.

Developing these defusion skills takes some time and effort but the benefits, in my opinion,  are well worth it.  There is a great article at getselfhelp.co.uk entitled:

DEFUSING TECHNIQUES

DON’T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU THINK!

It explains how:

“Defusion involves distancing, disconnecting or seeing thoughts and feelings for what they are (streams of words, passing sensations), not what they say they are (dangers or facts).”

The article outlines some really good strategies for developing defusion skills.  I really enjoyed it.

ACTivation Point!

SO ……………………….

 

just-for-today-when-stories-spin

 

How about YOU?

What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life?

 Just for today I will ………………………

If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you?

I am a student of ACT.  I am on a journey.  I would love you to join me.

With all good wishes

Corinne