ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY (ACT) – AN ONLINE RESOURCE
Q: What can I do when things change?
A: Accept and explore it!
It’s so hard accepting what we cannot change, especially if we don’t like it! If we don’t like something, the natural human reaction is, understandably, to try to alter it in some way. Sometimes that is possible, and if it is, then of course we should use our best efforts to bring about a desired result. But if it isn’t ……
If it isn’t possible to change something then sometimes the only thing to do is to let it go. That is painful, of course it is. But being willing to accept the pain just as it is can be less painful in the long run than futile denial and struggle.
I wrote “THE WORLD WE’VE GOT” to remind me of that.
HOW ABOUT YOU?
- Have you found any solace in accepting what you cannot change?
- How have you coped with the inevitable pain that accompanies loss?
- What can you share that might be of help to others?
Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
POEM FOR TODAY
THE WORLD WE’VE GOT
So now it’s really over and deep in our hearts we know
There will be no second chances, it is time to let it go,
For this horse has truly bolted, it’s too late to rein it in,
And for all our lamentations a new era will begin.
It will happen irrespective of our wanting it or not,
For new eras are quite callous and they will not care a jot
If we cling to our resistance, they’re too busy making hay,
Carving out a new tomorrow whilst we’re stuck in yesterday.
And so although it may be tempting to deny reality,
Waste our breath on wishful thinking, dissipate our energy
In a struggle that’s as futile as Canute found to his cost
When he tried to hold the tide back and inevitably lost.
And so whatever’s now occurring, even though it causes pain,
Let’s remember that surrender doesn’t mean we have to feign
Approbation for a circumstance we neither wished nor sought,
But if there’s a new reality we cannot then it thwart.
And so the more skilful reaction is to energy conserve,
Give a swerve to the unchangeable and effort now preserve
For the things that make life meaningful, for like it now or not,
This may not have been the world we sought but it’s the world we’ve got.
© Corinne Shields, 2016
If you enjoyed “THE WORLD WE’VE GOT” please pass it on, and do leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.
And just before you go …..
A final word from ACT …..
When we are in trouble, when we are really hurting, what we need above all is a kindly word, some compassion, a feeling that someone understands what we are going through.
If we are lucky we will have someone on hand to offer that hand of friendship. But sometimes more is required. Sometimes we will need to offer that hand of friendship to ourselves.
Reaching out to others is one of the unforeseen positives that can come out of a personal hurt. It is often when we are at our lowest ebb that we become willing to open up and share some of our hurt with others. Wonderful things can happen when we do this.
But let us not forget to be kind to ourselves too. Let us be willing to accept ourselves just as we are, warts and all, hurts and all. ACT is very clear on this. Reaching out to ourselves in an act of self compassion can be the best thing that we do for ourselves today.
I wrote a post about ACT and Self Compassion a while ago. Today I needed to remind myself once again about the benefits that accrue when we remember to be kind to ourselves.
How about YOU?
What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life?
Just for today I will ………………………
If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you?
I am a student of ACT. I am on a journey. I would love you to join me.
With all good wishes