ACCEPTANCE AND COMMITMENT THERAPY (ACT) – AN ONLINE RESOURCE
Q: When is the best time to make decisions?
A: When the heat of the moment is gone.
The phrase “startled thinking” is one we would do well to remember when life is in the process of throwing its challenges at us. Why? Because at such times it is highly likely that we are not thinking straight, or at least not to begin with.
ACT reminds us that at such times, in the midst of such challenges, our initial reactions are unlikely to be rational or logical. Quite the contrary. When something unexpected or unwelcome happens we should expect that our first reaction will be an emotional gut reaction. This is not the time to act. This is the time to play for time, to wait for the tide of high emotion to recede. The time for action will come later, hopefully in the shape of a more considered response which will work better for us.
“Don’t make permanent decisions based on temporary feelings” is a great mantra to draw on when we are tempted to hasty action.
I wrote “QUIET ACCEPTANCE” to remind me of that.
HOW ABOUT YOU?
- Have you learned not to make permanent decisions based on temporary feelings?
- Are you learning to recognise “startled thinking” for what it is?
- What can you share that might be of help to other?
Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
POEM FOR TODAY
A state of quiet acceptance, well it may sound rather dull,
Not being roused to high emotion, but emotion trying to cull
By sitting quietly on the side-lines as the feelings rush on through,
Yes it may sound rather boring but it can be best to do.
For life throws at us its challenges when things don’t go our way,
All the little unexpecteds that just happen every day,
And the way we trade our peace of mind for nothing much at all,
Yes sometimes a quiet acceptance can such turbulence forestall.
And the prize of equanimity’s not one we should disdain,
For it conserves in us an energy which then is ours to claim
For activities more fruitful, for endeavours that content,
So let’s beware the first reaction when such challenges are sent.
For we don’t have to inflame it, we can simply give it space,
Learn to breathe into a feeling as our heartbeat gathers pace
And then just watch as high emotion lashes out and then recedes
Whilst we wait patient on the side-lines until normal life proceeds.
And so next time a challenge enters, let’s not panic, let’s just wait,
Ride the tide of high emotion, let it rise and then abate,
And not succumb to startled thinking that just masquerades as fact,
For it is after quiet acceptance that ‘twill be the time to act.
© Corinne Shields, 2016
If you enjoyed “QUIET ACCEPTANCE” please pass it on, and do leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.
And just before you go …..
A final word from ACT …..
ACT reminds us that feelings are fleeting, they come and they go. It makes sense therefore to remember that there is a danger in making permanent decisions based on fleeting feelings. Will we be happy with a decision we make in the heat of the moment when the heat of the moment has cooled?
We would do better, ACT suggests, to refer to our values before we make important decisions. Knowing what matters, what really matters to us and making decisions accordingly is much the better choice.
How about YOU?
What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life?
Just for today I will ………………………
If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you?
I am a student of ACT. I am on a journey. I would love you to join me.
With all good wishes